Epic Rap Battle lyrics - Rhett and Link

See the full Epic Rap Battle lyrics from Rhett and Link. Epic Rap Battle lyrics belongs on the album Singles. Learn every word of your favourite song and get the meaning or start your own concert tonight :-). Rate this song's lyrics. Uploaded by Denese Rendell. Use it for personal and educational purposes only. Listen to these sick beats by Rhett and Link.

Song Epic Rap Battle video
Rhett and Link - Epic Rap Battle video

Epic Rap Battle lyrics

Link: First off I wanna tell ya I enjoyed the pizza.
Well it really wasn't great, but it allowed me to meetcha.
I'd like your number,
But I'm not gonna leave a big tip to get it.

Rhett: That means he's cheap and pathetic and if ya date him you'll regret it.
23 percent from me communicates,
I'm generous, not desperate, and I can calculate.

Link: Is she supposed to be impressed?
Rhett: Well if you want a battle be my guest

Link: I'm a computer programmer and a cubical dweller.
I disabled SpellCheck cuz I'm a stellar speller.
When I write an email that includes an attachment,
I never hit "send" before I've attached it.

Rhett: Your job is a bore.
I keep it hard core.
Sellin' knives and insurance from door to door.
You're reflectin' on a water cooler conversation
I'm givin' an incredible knife demonstration.

Rhett: Can I interest you in some accidental death coverage?
Or a hard boiled egg slicer?
Link: I can change your computer wallpaper to a tropical beach scene.
Rhett: Egg slicer.

Link: I car pool
Cuz I'm environmentally sensitive
I pack a snorkel cuz I'm clever and so inventative.
Rhett: It's inventive, inventative isn't a word.
Link: Yeah i just inventated it, you just got served.

Rhett: Well when I car pool, I take a group of third graders.
On my way to work I teach 'em multiplication tables.
See I'm a role model, an example to the youth.
Link: Then why did this kid just tell me that one times one is two?

Link: At the gym people line up just to give me a spot.
All eyes on me when I'm poppin' a squat.
My career Plan B is to teach P.E.
The model on the machine is based on me.

Rhett: I've mastered the art of mental manipulation
Workin' every muscle group through meditation
This is me workin' out my triceps.
Pick up my DVD called "Mind Reps."

Link: My since of style, is sweet like syrup.
It's not uncommon for people to think I'm from Europe.
Rhett: I don't follow the trends, I'm a style pioneer
See this turtleneck, with a necklace? You'll be wearing this next year.

Rhett: Is that all you got?
Link: No.

Link: I see buttons, I just push 'em to see what they do
If something were to go wrong I'd just blame it on you.

Rhett: I'm quick-witted, I always know just what to say.
Link: Then say something clever.
Rhett: Uh, ok.

Link: I was offered a record deal while singin' at a karaoke bar
But I turned it down and became the president's karaokezar(?).
Rhett: I rescued a dolphin entangled in a tuna net
And donated it to an orphanage to keep as a pet.

Lnik: I gave the Heimlich to a horse chokin' on beef jerky.
Two hours later he won the Kentucky derby.

Rhett: I'm allergic to nothin'.
Link: I'm allergic to weakness.
Rhett: I embrace my weaknesses and call them uniquenesses.

Link: I can drive a stick shift.
Rhett: Well I can golf.
Lnik: Well I can make it look like my thumb is comin' off.

Rhett: I invented the Half Nelson.
Link: I invented the Full Nelson!
Rhett: I've got a signed picture of Boris Yeltsin.

Link: My uncle is a lawyer!
Rhett: I roll my own sushi!
Link: I use the metric system exclusively!

Rhett: I know Morris code!
Link: Well i can speak it:
bop bop bop bop bop bop bop bop bop bop bop bop bop bop bop bop bop bop

Rhett: You just said that the square root of raspberry should be legalized.
Link: Exactly.



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